Monday, November 15, 2004

One Foot in Front of the Other

I fight against my friend apathy every day. When a task gets difficult and starts to command more of me than I am wanting to give, this little switch flips in my head and I then begin to justify why I will not give my attention to said task. Note the following example.

Self: I really should write a blog entry today.

Apathy: You don’t have to. No one reads it anyway. Besides, you have been OH SO BUSY doing OTHER THINGS.

Self: But have those other things haven't been important since Thursday.

Apathy: Of course they were.

Self: Not really. You see, I should be furthering my education, reading, ironing, anything but wasting time watching movies and playing computer games.

Apathy: You worked hard last week and earned a break. Don’t worry about blogging or any such silly thing. The homework will still be there next week.

Self: But maybe it would be nice to get ahead.

Apathy: Then you would never get any rest.

Yes, I actually had a conversation with myself like that this weekend. Perhaps it says something about my mental state. The motivated type A side says that I really have a million things to do and that I do not have time to play. Mr. Apathy thinks that I don’t have enough fun, and that I really need to stop to smell the roses. At any rate, I went full bore through the two exams that I took last Thursday, and then pretty much let Mr. Apathy rule my life for the next three days, doing only that which I absolutely had to. As a result, I had a nice weekend, it was restful, and I did enjoy some guilt-laden time for myself. However, now I have to face the music that I will be done with fall semester in just about a month, and my classes will not be doing any letting up between now and then. One day at a time, and with some diligent effort, and it will all end nicely. It is all about fighting the Apathy, and making our normal selves do spectacular things.

A thought from C.S. Lewis:
“We all want progress, but if you're on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive.”

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